Now you really have to be "old" to remember that song. Well it's the only song I could think of about smoke. I can't stand smoking. What am I doing with a man who smokes? I don't know. You'd think I was drawn to it or something. I won't allow it to be inside the house. My parents smoked, as a lot of baby boomers' parents did. I remember riding in the car with the windows barely cracked and my Mom and Dad smoking in the front seat. I sat in the back holding my nose. Gee, I wonder why I have asthma? Cough, cough!
"Be Honest Bob." My words.
"When was the last time you had a cigarette?" The doctor's words.
"Yesterday."
He was honest. He was truthful. (I don't know where he got one. There must be a dealer on the corner. He came back from getting the mail and he was puffing away.) Today was not a pleasant experience for either of us. Bob and I listened to the Neurologist tell him the BAD NEWS. He has artery disease which is apparently something he has had for anywhere from 10-15 years. Who knew? Not Bob. According to the doctor, Bob has been experiencing mini-strokes for all that time. He just had a large stroke in February. The doc gave him the riot act about cigarettes and even his beer. Don't know how this will affect him. I guess we'll see if it sinks in.
The doctor said that the bottom line was "if you don't stop smoking, you will probably have another stroke within 6-12 months and the likelihood of it being "the big one" and leaving you in the total care of your girlfriend or either very dead is great."
THE GOOD NEWS: if he can behave and not smoke and not drink as many beers then his chances of recovery are very good. Yea! Way to go! Go Bob! Have you got that spirit? (Oops, cheerleader flashback!)
I only see two problems here. One, he's Bob and very stubborn and has smoked all his life. Getting someone to change unless they want to is impossible. But I still have hope. Two, he will probably forget that the doctor did scare him today. He will forget and not feel the fear again like when the doc said that he could die soon from another stroke. I guess I can scare the stuffing out of him on a daily basis. After all, I'm a mother. What mother hasn't done that to a child? If you keep that up, your eyes will stick like that.
What can I really do? I don't know. I guess I can follow him everywhere he goes and never let him leave my sight. So that the nasty dealer on the corner can't put a gun to his head and make him take a cigarette. Or nothing different. Keep on keepin' on and remind him of today, love him and support him. I will do my best that is all I can do. Pray. Pray. Pray. Pray that he changes for himself and me. Pray that God allows us to have a life together.
My true love was true
Oh, I of course replied
Something here inside cannot be denied
They said someday you'll find
All who love are blind
Oh, when your heart's on fire
You must realize
Smoke gets in your eyes
From the home of Hope & Courage,
Jody
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